Dear Michele Bachmann:

Yesterday I heard that you wouldn’t be running for re-election in 2014. Some people are disheartened by this news. Others are not. You always have been a polarizing figure in politics and the reaction to your news yesterday just further proved that.



Now, I’m not here to gloat, make fun of you or speculate as to why you’re leaving today. I just wanted to bring up an interesting point I heard on NPR yesterday and make a suggestion.



NPR was reporting the details of your announcement and bringing in various pundits from both sides of the fence to discuss what it meant now that you’re leaving and to speculate what you’d do next. At one point it was brought up that you still have campaign funds of approximately $1.9 million. Now, legally you can’t just write a check for yourself since you’re dropping out of the race but those funds do exist and there are certain things that you can do with them. You could use them for legal defense fees in the ethics investigation currently underway, you could use them for another political campaign for yourself or perhaps to support some other republican’s campaign or you could donate it to charity.



Here’s a suggestion. Donate it all to charity.



Sure you could spend the money on lawyers or to prop up another republican campaign but think about just donating it all to charity. What better legacy could you leave? What better swan song than to take your war chest and use it to help an organization that’s out there only trying to do the most good? I’d suggest a completely apolitical organization. Something that has no left or right leanings like feed my starving children. It’s a christian organization but their only goal is to bring food to hungry kids around the world regarless of faith.



The best part of this? No liberal can give you shit for this. I certainly wouldn’t and I’ve taken jabs at you at every available opportunity in the last two years. Liberals would almost be forced to admit that it was incredibly generous of you to donate your campaign funds to charity when you could have easily used the money elsewhere.



Today’s my birthday, Congresswoman Bachmann. All I want is for you to donate your campaign funds to charity.



That and some donuts but you don’t need to help me there.

Maybe if punching bags were filled with bat shit insane zealot bitches instead of sand or whatever.



The Star Tribune posted an article today about how poor ol’ Michele Bachmann can’t catch a break. Even though she has shied away from the media since she got her ass handed to her in the primaries and ended up $80,000 in debt for her trouble, celebrities still take jabs at her. Her special brand of crazy is inspiring a plot line in True Blood, Jane Fonda calls her “nothing but a hairdo” in Aaron Sorkin’s new show and Catherine Zeta-Jones cited Bachmann as inspiration for her character in Rock of Ages.



Now I’ve taken my fair share of jabs at Bachmann. So many that I can spell her name correctly without looking it up (one “l”, two “n”s) but I haven’t written about her at all recently because she hasn’t done anything new and exciting since horribly failing at running for president. The article is asking why Hollywood is still taking shots at her even though she hasn’t done anything newsworthy lately and republican strategist Sarah Janecek states “”She created a vivid picture in those presidential debates as the only woman doing just fine against the men. With her perfect looks plus her ideology, in the age of celebrity, she became one.”



According to republican strategists, doing just fine = 6th place in the Iowa caucuses and perfect looks = this –

I love how she wears so much makeup there’s practically lens flare coming off her cheeks and how her hollow eyes communicate nothing but insanity. SO HOT. Easy to see how she turned Marcus straight.