Tag Archives: ebay

You Can Find Anything On Ebay, Baby.

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A couple weeks ago, YoungNotions announced that we would no longer be doing those shitty text ads advertising ways you can make money at home. We got tired of supporting products we didn’t believe in for a tenth of a Euro. I don’t even know what that translates to in American, but it’s just not worth it.

Instead, we made a Facebook post offering limited sponsor placement for people we like. I would rather our space gets used to promote products and people we believe in. YoungNotions.com is our baby, and if we’re going to sell her, we want it to be to people we like and trust.

You know. Like Misty VanHorn, who is said to have tried selling her children on Facebook to raise funds to bail her boyfriend out of jail.

“The going price was $1,000 for her 10-month-old daughter and … $4,000 for a package deal that included her 2-year-old son.” -firsttoknow.com

And now we know which child she values more.

But Misty is not the only person to attempt selling her children on the internet. A woman in Dallas tried to sell her 4 month old on Criagslist (price not listed), and just so you don’t think it’s only Americans, a German mother tried to sell her 7 month old baby on eBay starting at one Euro. She says she did it as a joke, but eBay shut her down and turned her in just the same.

And she received no bids before she was shut down. That poor baby’s self-esteem must be just awful right now.

Baby selling isn’t just for the internet. One woman tried to sell her baby for $500 at a Taco Bell (would you like that to go?) and one couple at Walmart attempted to sell their 8 month old for just $25.

You really can’t beat the prices at Walmart.

Most of these attempted sales are shitty situations, people that shouldn’t have children, selling them off for drug money. And I say let them. Obviously they shouldn’t have their children if they’re going to use. It’s a win-win.

I did try to find a story where someone sold their child for something other than drugs. I chased down an internet rumor that someone sold their child for Beyonce tickets but it turns out that was just a photoshopped headline passed around the internets for amusement. No one actually tried to sell their baby for tickets to a Beyonce concert.

Nowaygirl

Look, it’s about economics. The going rates for a baby is at least two Eric Clapton balcony seats.

Slacking on the Job Taken to a Whole New Level

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My job isn’t very easily defined. I’m 1 part homemaker, 1 part learning coach for an online student, 1 part YoungNotions managing person, and 2 parts Fearless marketing director.

As a marketing director, I spend a lot of time online. On our website, on Facebook promoting events, on Twitter. For YoungNotions, I’m doing the same, but only promoting 1 company, not 7. On top of writing half the articles (ahem). As a learning coach, I log on to my son’s online school to record attendance and keep up with his classes. Even as a homemaker, I’m online looking up bread recipes.

My point is, I have found ways to spend the majority of my time on the internet that I love.

I made it myself!

I made it myself!

What I have NOT tried in my quest for more internet time is to outsource my job.

ABC (which is fast becoming my favorite in wacky news) reports that a man (ABC calls him Bob) was caught personally outsourcing his job to China. He was getting rave reviews from his managers on his incredible work. All the while, some dude in China was getting a 6th of this guy’s paycheck for doing all his work.

It was going so well, Bob started doing the same thing with a couple other companies. So when he got caught at this one, several other dudes in China lost their jobs.

And what was Bob doing with all that free time? Stellar reporter Julie Gerstein from “The Friskey” found the answer:

9:00 a.m. – Arrive and surf Reddit for a couple of hours. Watch cat videos.
11:30 a.m. – Take lunch.
1:00 p.m. – Ebay time.
2:00 p.m – Facebook/LinkedIn updates
4:30 p.m. – End of day update e-mail to management.
5:00 p.m. – Go home.

This is absolutely deplorable. He should be ashamed of himself. All that free time, and not one minute of Twitter or Steam.

We’re Going to Date You All… Night… Long (Oh Yeah).

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Hey there girl. You’re looking a little down. I think I know the problem.



Girls like you have needs. You need to be wined and dined, you need to have sparkling conversation. You need a night to just cut loose and have fun. We can do that for you, girl.



Girls like you also need to feel like you’re doing something to help the community. I can tell by the look in your eyes that you see all these non-profit organizations around you and you want to help but you just don’t know how. We can help you with that, girl. Just relax and let us do all the work.



We see you scratching your head, girl, wondering who I’m referring to when I say “we”. That’s my wife and I, girl. The two of us want to take you out on a date. Just you and we.



Yeah, girl. That’s us with Santa and also Leah Mansfield. They won’t be coming to our date. Just you and me and my wife, girl.





This date isn’t just about fun, though. You know we want to make you happy girl but we’re also supporting HUGE Theater in their yearly ebay auction fundraiser. That’s right, girl. You can look at all the stuff they have to offer or you can just check out our date night auction here.



And you know your donation will be tax deductible girl. We know how you like those tax deductions.



And don’t worry, girl. You may be a guy who wants to go out on a date night with us and you can still bid if you’re a guy, girl. I just find it awkward to switch between male and female second person references, girl.



We’ll do anything you want. This night is all about you. We’ll take you to the finest moderately priced restaurant in town. Order anything you want, girl.



Maybe you want to just relax and watch a movie? We’ll take you to the dollar theater during matinee times, girl. You want some candy? I’ll sneak in any kind of candy you want because maybe they don’t have the kind of candy you want, girl. Also it’s like two bucks cheaper.



Seriously, girl. I know theaters make like 90% of their profits off concessions but they’re going to charge four bucks for a bag of twizzlers when I can get the same bag for 1.75 at the grocery store? That’s outrageous, girl.



We may be on a tight budget but you know we’ll show you a good time. And when the nights over and you want the good times to take a turn for the sexy, girl? That’s not going to happen.



Seriously, pretty sure that’s prostitution if we offer sex in an ebay auction so that’s out of the picture. Also, Jena said no.



There’s less than three days left in that auction, girl. Why don’t you go place a bid and have us make all your moderately priced, non sexual dreams come true.