Tag Archives: racism

Penn State Taking Baby Steps to Being Less Awful.

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CNN posted a story about Penn State’s Chi Omega sorority posting a picture on tumblr that’s… well, here it is.



Yeah...

Yeah…





So yeah. That’s pretty racist. The photo was taken at a mexican themed party at the sorority and a lot of people are very offended and Penn State is currently investigating the sorority but I think it’s really important to remember that this is Penn State we’re talking about. At least a bunch of kids didn’t get raped in this scandal.



Don’t get me wrong. I think it’s pretty bad that the Chi Omegas would think it’s funny to reduce latino culture to a bunch of sombrero wearing, mustachioed landscapers and it’s baffling that they would think it would be okay to post the picture online but take a look at that picture again. How many kids are getting raped in the picture? Zero. That’s a real step in the right direction for Penn State.



Not to mention it only took a week after this picture was posted for the shit to hit the fan. Why, I remember a time where it would take well over a decade of something bad happening at Penn State before anybody would know about it. Penn State has really taken great strides in being open about their horrible culture.



Racism is bad. I’m not trying to debate that. I’m just saying we should be thankful that all they did was make fun of Mexicans and not rape a bunch of them and try to cover it up for years and years.



Hopefully, the girls of Chi Omega have learned to be a little more respectful and understanding of different cultures and hopefully the scandals of Penn State become less severe as time goes on. If we’re lucky maybe we’ll hear about some illegal gambling going on at Penn State a year from now. As long as they’re not enabling a serial pedophile.


Drunk Post, by Bill Young

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Friday night I had too much to drink. Far too much to drink.



I planned on a quiet night in or perhaps going to the CCUG open micbut I ended up getting a call from my friend Josh who runs Club Underground at the Spring Street Tavern. He needed somebody to work the door and would pay a modest fee and throw in some free booze as well.



Some = all. I drank all the booze. There’s none left. Go to any liquor store today. You’ll just find the employee shrugging and saying something like “I don’t know. It’s… all gone.” It’s all gone because I drank it all in one night working the door for a hip hop show.



As the cab drove me home that night, I stuck my head out the window like a dog because the breeze on my face helped fight the dizzyness. I asked the driver to stop a few blocks short of my house because I wanted to walk around a bit before I got home. It was a beautiful night out and if I were to lay down at that moment I would have got the spins something awful. This was about 2:45 AM.



Pay attention to that time, there. I’m taking a writing class at The Learning Annex and I’m trying something out my instructor calls “foreshadowing”.



About 15 minutes into my winding journey home I stumbled across three African (like, actual African. They had the accents) teenagers hanging out in an open minivan. One of them called out to me and says “Hey, man! You know where we can get some ruffies?”



I thought for a moment about how awesome it is that I look like a date rapist at first glance, politely tell them that I don’t and ask why they’d want ruffies in the first place.



“Because they get you high, right?”



Oh, thank god! For a second I thought they pegged me for a sex offender but in reality they just thought I was a drug addict! I tell them what it’s commonly used for, why you shouldn’t use that and that it’s probably hard to find anyway but I wouldn’t know because I’ve never even looked for the stuff before! I mean, come on!



We talk for a while, I assure them I don’t have any drugs and don’t know where to find any, only now realizing I could’ve totally pranked them by telling them to try smoking nutmeg or dog shit for a buzz. I then invite them to my show the next night at the CCUG, regretting that I didn’t have any business cards with me (they never showed up anyway so fuck ’em). We parted ways and I stumbled in the vague direction of my home. Little did I know that my night was far from over…



You like what I just did there? More Leaning Annex magic my instructor taught me called a “cliffhanger”. Thanks to my instructor, mystery novel author Jeanette Michaels and be sure to check out her book –







Buy it at her etsy store today!


Dumb Racists For Obama

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I’ve seen this photo being shared around facebook a lot lately –



Did you need to use the confederate…. whatever.




In fact, if you google it, you can find a surprising amount of stars-n’-bars support for Obama –



The south shall rise again! Until then, vote Obama!




Obama at a campaign stop in Cousinlove, AL.





I can just imagine Jeff Foxworthy hunched over a notebook scribbling “If you’re in favor of a public health care option…”


The furthest I could trace back that first sign is from a politico article in 2008. In fact, all of the images are from around the time of his first campaign. I even found a blog called obamaredneck.com and all their posts are from 2008 and 2009 (there’s really not much there. The last few posts are about Ted Nugent’s latest book, mercury in fish and legalizing pot). How did I miss out on this seemingly huge base of redneck fans? And why do they keep having to use the Confederate Flag image in all their stuff?


I know that there’s an ongoing debate on the whole Confederate Flag thing. There are some who think that it’s a racist symbol. An image linked to the Confederacy, which seceded from the U.S. when Abraham Lincoln was elected because he campaigned for ceasing the expansion of slavery. Then there’s the racists who use it because they don’t like black people and shout “IT’S ABOUT STATE’S RIGHTS” when they get called on their bullshit.



Seriously, if you think the Confederate Flag isn’t steeped in racism then you’re either just dumb or you’re dumb and also racist.



I remember a few months ago when West St. Paul Councilman Ed Hansen made news for hanging a confederate flag in his backyard that said “redneck” (he subsequently took it down). From the article – “He sees the flag as a symbol of free speech and individual liberty.” The only way the Confederate Flag is connected to free speech is if you want to be free to yell “work harder, boy!” at a black guy that you’re making work for no pay.



As far as the “State’s rights” argument goes. Ask somebody who uses that argument which state’s rights they’re talking about. If they don’t have an answer (which they probably don’t), here’s one from the wikipedia page for state’s rights –



Supporters of slavery often argued that one of the rights of the states was the protection of slave property wherever it went, a position endorsed by the U.S. Supreme Court in the 1857 Dred Scott decision. In contrast, opponents of slavery argued that the non-slave-states’ rights were violated both by that decision and by the Fugitive Slave Law of 1850. Exactly which—and whose—states’ rights were the casus belli in the Civil War remain in controversy.



So basically the Rednecks for Obama are saying that ideally, he’d be a slave but since that can’t happen they’ll settle for President.

White People!

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Duluth, MN is a predominantly white city. Settled originally by Vikings when their ship crashed into the harbor after being tricked by freshwater mermaids, the city has not seen much racial diversity until a couple of black families moved there a while back.



While racial diversity is in low supply in Duluth, racial disparity is bursting at the seams. With 67% of the black and 56% of the Native American population living in poverty (compared to 18% of white people). With this in mind, the Unfair Campaign was created in hopes to spark conversations about racism, specifically, “white privilege”. The campaign put up these posters around the city –


Black people are lucky people don't write shit on their faces all the time.




Usually after I pass out at a party people just draw dicks on my face, not a bunch of stuff about white privilege.




Something something clever 3rd caption joke




As well as billboards that say “It’s HARD to see RACISM when you’re white”.


The campaign has certainly sparked conversation. According to the Star Tribune, white people are totally offended.


From the article – “Hundreds of the city’s white residents have complained that the campaign’s kick-off images and messages are offensive. The campaign, they say, blames all racism on whites”. Granted, not all racism comes from whites, just the kind that has any effect on people’s lives.



The campaign has received worldwide attention and the mayor of Duluth has recieved dozens of messages from all over calling for the death of a race traitor. Seriously. White supremacist websites are even talking about it (don’t click the link. It’s… not pleasant).


Turns out the Unfair campaign was wrong. White people can see racism just fine, especially when it’s the kind of racism where white people are accused of not acknowledging racism which is apparently a form of racism.


And racism that’s not actually racism against white people is the worst racism of all.

Google Racism

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A while back Jena and I wanted some Chinese food and due to a recent switch to a dairy free lifestyle, she was concerned about those little donut things she loves having milk ingredients. I went to google “are chinese donuts dairy free” but right after I typed “are chinese” google decided it had an idea of what I was looking for.


Chinese fire drills are legal but only when conducted by a certified Chinese fire marshall.




Well, looks like I just invented a new game called –


Let’s See How Racist Google Auto-Complete Can be in Only Two Words.


People don’t know if Indians should celebrate Christmas because… what?


I’m not saying Google’s an Islamophobe but I just typed “are musl” and it was all “DID YOU KNOW MUSLIMS ARE TAKING OVER THE WORLD? SHARIA LAW! VICTORIA JACKSON WAS RIGHT!


Of course Australians eat Kangaroos. That’s what Vegemite is made of, right?


Of course Eskimos spend their lives in tiny houses made of ice blocks. They also “kiss” by rubbing their noses together. They also have 30 words for racist.


Wow. That one’s actually pretty bad, Google auto-complete. You’ve officially crossed over from cutesy “ignorant grandma” racism to full blown “guy with confederate flag shirt” racism. How can I end on a high note now? Oh, I know!


Are midgets not supposed to have night vision? Is somebody concerned about this? Look at all the suggestions on yahoo! answers. There’s seriously a bunch of answer sites dedicated to the midget/night vision thing. There’s even a facebook fan page dedicated to the fact that this exists on google.



Congratulations on being weirdly racist, google! I can’t wait to see the google doodle you make for the anniversary of Birth of a Nation.

Some Pictures From My Phone!

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So I got Punch-Out! for the Wii and was all set to do a blog about how incredibly racist it is (the Lisa Lampanelli “it’s okay because I’m racist towards all races” racism) but after a bit of googling I found that it was pretty well worn territory.

Seriously after I TKO'd Piston Hondo I'm surprised he didn't pull out a fucking katana and commit seppuku.




Well, since that horse has been beaten to death here’s some pictures from my phone!



Master hypnotist and Boris Karloff impersonator Brad Garrett!

It’s like the photographer asked him to do a big line of coke right before the picture was taken.


Actual size.

I walked up to it and a british guy with a bowtie stepped out and asked if I wanted to travel with him.



MISMATCHED STEAK KNIFE WOLVERINE!




Fucking creepy.

At a friend’s house. Creepy as hell but wait! There’s more! Let’s zoom in on this.


Oh shit.

He’s reaching for the knife!


Sex-Murder is the worst kind of murder. Murder by sex.

I saw this on the magazine rack at Savers. It’s like if episodes of Law and Order: SVU were written by the people who worked on The Weekly World News. I kind of regret not buying them but I doubt anybody’s snatched up those literary treasures.


The Cover for my new detective novel, "The Mystery of the Murderous Mariachi Mannequin".

At least he’s not a sex-murderer. I hope.


If you’d like to see what I was taking phone pics of in 2006, check out this old myspace blog!