The Happy Home-Maker’s Guide to Happy Home-Making

Ladies and Gentlemen, I am now a home-maker.

My first day is turning out rough.

First of all, with Fest, Bill working a new job for the past couple weeks, me working my old job up until yesterday, no one has been designated to clean. Which means there’s dishes in the sink that need doing, Fest costuming and sewing supplies scattered all over, a huge mound of laundry to be done, boxes of things from my old office (mostly books that I have no place to put right now), and for some reason, prom dresses all over the place.

What I want for my home is the pristine, sparkling, everything in it’s place look you expect from the 50’s Susie home-maker, pearls and housedresses and a feather duster with a little apron.

Well, at least our gas stove looks right…

Instead, it looks like Susie got off the happy pills, had a mid life crisis, sunk into a deep depression, and is curled up on the couch, wearing mis-matched sweats, manically going through her old clothes, trying to remember better days when she was pretty, before 3 children and her pack a day habit.

The gas stove is still there… somewhere.

Also, Jared just got back from vacationing with his father, so he’s now 2 days behind in his school studies. We got all his school supplies after Jared left, so we didn’t get to set up his study area with him yet. He’s online, working through a tutorial, there are text books everywhere, and we can’t find his notebooks. Of course my son sees this as the perfect opportunity to try to put off note-taking. And I’m pushing him through his lessons a s quickly as possible while still retaining knowledge, cause he has an online live class session at noon that he isn’t going to be prepared for.

Yes, I just ended that sentence with a preposition. Piss off. I’m the learning coach, and I’m going to learn my son good.

On top of that, I have a cold. There’s a mound of tissues next to me, my head is swimming, and the energy is non-existent. If I had the energy, I’d go get some cold medication to combat my lack of energy.

In short, not even halfway through my first day, and I’m already giving up. I’m going to eat some bon-bons and watch my stories.

Happy home-making, everyone!!!