Another Response to Craigslist Job Postings!

Every week I search the craigslist job listings under “talent” and “tv/video/film” and while most of them are either porn companies and stip clubs looking for “talent” or student filmmakers holding open auditions for their totally artistic and not at all pretentious project, there’s always some worth responding to. Here’s the latest diamond in the rough –


TLC CASTING EXTREME CHEAPSKATES
Congratulations, Minneapolis!

This morning, you were named one of most frugal city in America. That’s excellent news for your wallet — and excellent news for everyone’s favorite cable network: TLC. Having just completed two awesome seasons of Extreme Couponing, we’re looking for another breed of thrifty genius: the Extreme Cheapskate.

Just prior to new years, we aired a special that featured a man who washed and reused his paper towels, and another who cooked and ate goat’s head all in the interest of saving a few dollars. Now, we’re excited to say that we’ll be making the topic an eight-episode series, and we’re looking for folks who have unique and smart ways to cut corners and pinch pennies.

If you’re interested in being considered, and have some amazing cost-cutting measures that other people will find amazing, don’t hesitate to get in touch with us. To see clips of the special, check out TLC’s website — there are a few videos showing the good-natured and fun look we took into people’s brilliant frugal moments.

For more information about the casting requirements, check out www.michaelpetrella.com/current — all of the relevant details are listed there, but you’re welcome to e-mail from this posting directly.

Compensation: TBD
Principals only. Recruiters, please don’t contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.




Here’s my response.



Hi, TLC! I’d say I love your network but I’m actually too cheap to get cable. It’s expensive!

I’ve actually been cheap all my life. I think I picked up the habit from my mother when I was little. She was so cheap, she would clip coupons for the dollar store. I could already tell that I was thrifty at a young age because I never even paid attention.

Now, in adulthood, I’ll do everything to save a buck. I rarely eat out. In fact, when I do go out, I’m so cheap I go to KFC and lick other people’s fingers. My eating habits at home have been affected, too. I actually found that you can save on milk by eating cereal with a fork.

I’ve taken measures around the house to pinch pennies as well. I disconnected the doorbell to lower my electric bill so when people push the button I have to stick my head out the window and yell “DING DONG”. I also never buy new appliances. My TV is so old that it has two channels. On and off. I’m actually so cheap that when somebody came over to my house and stepped on a cigarette butt I asked who turned out the heat.

I should go now. The people at the coffee shop start to ask questions if you don’t buy anything and I’ve been here for four days now. Hope to hear from you soon!

Man, I can’t wait until I’m a big time reality TV star.

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