Courtney McLean invited me to “like” a cause on facebook a while back called SlutWalk Minneapolis. My first reaction was to scream “You’re the slut, slut!” but I sheathed my claws quickly and realized she probably wasn’t calling me a slut (I can be so catty sometimes). I soon found out that the SlutWalk was actually an anti rape thing and not a walk full of sluts.

I found out more about the SlutWalk (man I can’t wait for the search engine terms to hit this site after typing “slut” 50 times in one post) from today’s Star Tribune article. It seems this started in Canada where all activism starts. At a college safety seminar in Toronto, a police officer told young women that they were less likely to be raped if they didn’t dress like sluts.

I totally understand where the guy is coming from. Not a day goes by that I see a woman with some exposed skin and I have to batter down my completely natural urge to have my way with her. Not that she’d mind, judging by the way she was dressed.

What women don’t understand about men is that we are solely motivated by sex. The only reason I go to sleep at night is that I’ll have the energy the next day to have sex. The other day I was in the produce section of the grocery store trying to figure out which kind of apples would let me fuck more (the guy working there was no help).

I am a machine. I don’t yell at a car when I step on the gas and it goes forward.

Those signs might as well say "I want every man to have sex with me always."

In spite of all this, the SlutWalk claims that women are actually the victims of rape. If women are the victims of rape, then why do only 6% of rapists in Minnesota serve jail time for raping*?

Whatever your views on it may be, there’s a fundraiser at the Acadia Cafe in Minneapolis tonight and the Minneapolis slutwalk happens on Saturday. I’d go but frankly, I can’t be held responsible for what would happen if I showed up. I’m just a man.

(*stat taken from a quote from the StarTrib article by a musician. May not be true but I’m too lazy to follow up on it.)