I agree with the message of the Occupy movement. The method is a different story.

I do think that there is a serious problem with the wealth distribution in this country and while plenty of people will say that protesting doesn’t actually change anything these days, the Occupy movement is getting some serious press. I hated reading stories of police using tear gas and rubber bullets on protesters and when I heard about cities cracking down on camping in the parks and arresting protesters I felt a little conflicted. On one hand, I hated to see these peaceful protests broken up. On the other, I was thankful that this would give the protesters a chance to wash the fuck up.

Seriously. If I go one day without a shower I get a little greasy and if I go two I’m pretty ripe. These protests have been going on since August and most of these hippies haven’t had more than whore baths in Burger King bathroooms. There’s nothing sanitary about a burger king bathroom. That’s where Humpty gets busy.

Frankly, I’m not even sure why they camped there anyway. Would it be less effective to Occupy Wall Street until 10PM and then go home and sleep? Am I missing something important to the message here?

When you think about it, the government is probably doing these people a favor by making them go home. Sleeping in a tent and eating hobo stew every day can’t be good for the mind. I’ve never camped for more than three nights in a row but whenever I got home after a camping trip I’m always a little feral. I can’t imagine shitting in a port-o-potty for 60 days straight will leave a man with much sanity.

Is that really who you want to be representing your message? Some crazy eyed stink machine with chunks of pigeon meat in his shaggy beard? Sure, bank executives are greedy but at least I don’t have to make sure to breathe through my mouth while talking to them.

Now Thinkprogress just reported that NY Mayor Bloomberg was issued a temporary restraining order allowing protesters back into Zuccoti park with their tents. That’s all well and good but how about a compromise? You can chant and wail about the Bildeberg group all you like but how about two nights a week you go home, clean up and sleep on a bed? Wednesdays and Sundays. Your message will get across just as clear and you won’t seem like insane sewer dwellers.