I hate this place.
I’m not just saying that because my wife has expressed jealousy that she’s not here, this whole area is just awful. It’s been the worst week of my life and I want to get out of here. Just look at some of the shit I’ve had to put up with in the last 7 days.
Stupid ocean.
This area’s home to some of the largest coral reefs in the world. I hate it.
Stupid hammock.
Hammocks suck so bad you have a hard time staying awake in them.
Stupid swing chair.
At La Buena Vida, the bar stools are swings and there’s tree houses you can sit in and order drinks by lowering a bucket down on a rope. The food and drinks are super tasty and affordable and the staff is friendly. I hate it.
Pfft.
Building stupid sandcastles on a stupid picturesque beach. Whatever.
Stupid pool.
Hanging out at the pool behind the Casa Del Sol with my friends. Not my idea of fun.
The waterfall's loud.
Hanging out in the backyard of Casa Del Sol, the five bedroom house we’ve been staying at. There’s a pool and waterfall in the backyard and a path leading to a stupid lagoon where you can swim with a bunch of tropical fish or whatever. The Grateful Dead used to stay here or something. I hate it. There’s too many kitchens.
Who has fun drinking?
Drinking with my friend Chris. You can get a decent bottle of rum here for like 7 bucks. Booze has been flowing freely in the house and we’ve had parties almost every night. It sucks.
I can’t wait until this festival’s over. I hate comedy.