This website is powered by WordPress which allows me to check various stats like page views, links and other cool stuff without having to know a lot of stuff about computers.  One of the stats I can look at is “search engine terms” or, the things people type into google and other search engines (I’m still rooting for you, ask.com!) result in a click to this site. I have to say, a lot of the things typed into google that leads here is pretty unsettling. Here’s my 5 favorites.

5:  foreskin man penis.  I can see how this one would lead to the site, considering the blog I did on Foreskin Man(Issue 3 is out! He goes to Africa and meets the superheroine “Vulva Girl”. No lie) but I don’t think that’s what this person was looking for.

4:  todd  palin hairy chest.  Again, I get it.  I’ve written a post about Sarah Palin but I can’t help but feel sorry for the poor closeted Alaskan who was looking for some sweet shirtless pics and just ended up here. Disappointed perverts is kind of the theme of this whole post. Speaking of which –

3:  public young fucking.  Alright.  My last name is Young and I swear a lot.  That covers the last two words but public?  Your guess is as good as mine.  What’s really disturbing is that somebody out there is googling porn.  Think about it.  Anybody who has had the internet and functioning sex organs for more than two months already has their website that they go to.  It’s free, usually has things sorted by genre and is loaded with thousands of hours of content.  There’s about a half dozen sites like that out there and most everybody has figured it out but this guy (or gal but probably guy), however, is still googling porn.  It’s creepy.

2:  how can lives be saved in africa?  Thank god somebody has finally decided that this is a problem that needed solving or at the very least, googling.  Unfortunately, this young idealistic would be hero ended up at my blog with no answers.

1:  shitting while standing bad for health.  I’m not even going to bother trying to figure out how this led to our website but why would anybody ever need to type this into a search engine?  Was this person honestly shitting while standing so much that when they started to get back pain the figured it was related?  Why were they shitting while standing to begin with?  How do you even do that without making a huge mess everywhere?  GODDAMNIT YOU PEOPLE ARE SICK.

Honorable mentions:

revenge of curly’s ghost

gbtv what the fuck

goes on a plate

palin in prophecy 2012

should we worry about may 21st 2011