Do Old People Get Zits?

Please tell me old people don’t get zits.

When I was going through puberty, I was told that although zits can be a pain in the ass, it’s all a part of growing up and I’d be over them. The fact that my parents and health teachers could just lie to me like that with a straight face is sickening. What they should have said, if they had any balls or respect for me, was that I’ll still get zits, just not as many on my face. I’ll get them in exciting new places like on my back and inside my nose.

“Inside my nose?”, I’ll ask in confusion.

“Yes, inside your goddamn nose” they’ll reply. “You’ll never know exactly where it is but every time you touch one side of your nose it will hurt like a bitch. You can’t exactly shove a Cearasil pad up there so you just leave it be until it grows so much that you accidentally pop it blowing your nose or something. By the way, nothing’s more gross than the feeling of a zit pop inside your nose but at least it’s over”. I’ll ask them when the pimples will ever end and they’ll just look at me and shrug.

Why yes I do have a pimple in my nose right now and it’s driving me fucking insane, how did you know?

One thought on “Do Old People Get Zits?

  1. This is a common concern that many of my patients have. I agree with most of what you have to say on the matter, though I think that swearing at children would be ill advised.

    While I could go into the matter at length on here, it’s all explained in my book, “You Probably Shouldn’t Swear At Children.”

    It’s a short book.

    To answer your initial question; I don’t know. I’m not a very good doctor.

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