Well, the 10,000 Laughs Comedy Festival is done. I did five shows, watched even more and a couple of the comics from Chicago ended up staying on my couch last week. Not only has it been fun having some company but very educational as well. I’ve learned a lot about the city that would be our neighbor if it wasn’t for stupid Wisconsin standing in the way and I’d like to share with you the top 5 facts that I’ve learned about Chicago.

1. Chicagonians only eat two kinds of food. Deep dish pizza, Hot dogs with mustard in poppy seed buns and Chicago style “stuffed pizza” which is a deep dish pizza stuffed with hot dogs with mustard in poppy seed buns.

2. Chicago is bordered by Lake Michigan, the Great Lake that most resembles a penis –

See?

3. Willis Tower (formerly Sears Tower) is the 8th tallest structure in the world. Over 30 people commit suicide every week from it’s controversial, unsupervised open air observation deck.

4. In the 1920s Chicago was home to some of the nation’s most notorious gangsters such as Al Capone, Bugs Moran, Flattop Jones, Two Face and Oprah Winfrey.

5. The Great Chicago Fire of 1871 burned for two days and engulfed over three square miles of the city. The traditional account is that the fire started when farmer O’Leary’s cow accidentally kicked over a lantern but it turns out that was a fabrication. The cow kicked over the lantern to collect on an insurance policy.

For more information on Chicago, ask someone who lives in Southeastern Wisconsin.