Alright, kiddos. It’s time once again to take a weekly look at all those promises I made January 1st and see how they’re holding up. Let’s just look at the ones I’ve broken this week.



Work out every day I’m not working my day job.
This one’s probably the one I want to accomplish the most but has been the hardest one to get into a groove. I’m looking to lose some pounds and tone up so I can conquer the mocking island of fat failure. Jena even bought me a pull up bar to help me out but I haven’t even installed it in the door frame (who even owns a drill these days, right?). I did go for a walk yesterday but came back after 15 minutes because it was too cold.



No more junk food
I’ve been doing okay with this one for the most part. There have been some setbacks (damn your convenience and affordability, fast food!) but I’ve been eating healthier overall. Except for Sunday. Sunday there was a pumpkin pie.

There’s been an entire pumpkin pie in the freezer since Thanksgiving. I decided that some freezer space needed to be cleared up so I brought it out and ate some pie with the wife. Here’s a pie chart to show how that went down.

Ladies and gentlemen, here are the limits of my ms paint abilities.

RED: How much pie I cut for myself
GREEN: Additional pie put on my plate because I cut the first slice all sloppy and there was just loose pie bits hanging around in the tin.
BLUE: Jena’s slice.
YELLOW: Thought it was safe but I totally came back for it like ten minutes later.
BLACK: Remaining pie. Currently in fridge. Going to ask the wife and boy to eat that soon because I CANNOT BE TRUSTED.

So yeah, pumpkin pie is delicious and I’m an awful glutton.



Quit playing stupid flash games
This has been the hardest one of all my resolutions to kick. I don’t think I’ve even strung two days together on this one. What the fuck is wrong with me?



Actually meet all my writing deadlines for this website and my sketch comedy stuff.
Well, this was supposed to go up yesterday so…



Stop biting my fingernails.
This has been the second toughest thing to kick. No clue why, just can’t get enough of that sweet, sweet keratin.



Get more standup comedy work in 2013.
Hasn’t happened yet. I don’t know why not. I haven’t tried to get any work. I guess the only thing I can do now is to actually try to get work. Hopefully doing something will yield better results than doing nothing.

Hard to tell, though. I’ve never tried doing something before. First time for everything, I guess.



More resolutioney goodness next week!